September 23 2015

PREFACE

indian warrior 1

I am Ricky, I am the mother of a Beautiful Son, who grew up in a home with a Mother, Father, Brother and two Sisters. Our home was always full of Love, Caring and Trust..

My story, is about how I dealt with my youngest son, and how he became sick. With a disease that has effected so many families across the world. In one way or another. How I, tried desperately to cope with my life and my families lives as everything seemed to unravel before my eyes. My family was know longer the same. My Husband & I, my growing children and this child who was know longer the same person that I nurtured.

He is and always will be the light of my heart. I never thought I would have another, child. He came ten years after my first son.

I was in denial of the crisis that this boy was going through. Yes, there were so many signs. Being the mother who thought, she had all of the control. To a Mother, who realized there is no such thing as being in control. Of anything or anybody. My control was over myself and know other.

Control for me was, whatever I said. Whatever I stood for. My rules.

Were in place for my children to adhere to. Funny thing was, this Mother was listened to, until they started to grow up and make decisions for themselves. They past me by as they learned, grew and moved.

My Son, was the last to live with us. When he began High School, I was afflicted with a terrible illness that lasted for seven years. Leaving him to flounder. My son faced many challenges. During this time.

Trying desperately to figure out what he wanted to be, what he wanted to do with his life. On this road he experimented with many Drugs.

His last before he entered a Rehab Facility was, “HEROIN”!

I am forever grateful that he was SAVED! Today he is clean. By the Grace & Love, of G-d, My Son is alive and well.

He has made his life a, Mission to help People who have succumbed to this Disease! He has also grown to be a beautiful loving, caring man. With his family forever by his side with Love, Caring and Trust.

 

 

September 10 2015

I Have A Son

cropped-hands-of-hope-or-death.jpgHe is tall, strong and kind. His smile lights up my heart. Have you ever met him? You would remember him as he has a great personality and he loves his family. Have you ever spoke to him? He has not much to say as I feel, he fell into a very deep hole and has a hard time expressing himself around family. I have been looking for him for a long, long time. Do you think he is having a problem? My Son… Maybe you could help him if you have met him. Have you seen him? Please tell me. Have you seen him? I do not think he knows how deep the hole is! I cannot find him.

I Miss Him….Have you seen My son? Can you find him and bring him home to me?

I miss you Son..

I want to see the love in your eyes again. Not this blank deep stare that you show. Not your sallow skin. That was once pink. Not the lips that move with the sound
of needing something that, will one day, destroy the man that I call my Son.

If  I could turn back the clock. If I had the power I surely would! How did this happen? Why did this happen? Am I, to be blamed for this travesty. I think of all the times while you were growing up that I tried to keep you safe.

If he called out very loud and shouted my name. I would Hear him… But I cannot? He does not want to be heard. “I know you have him and you will not tell me, you have a grip on my Son”!You are holding on so tight to him.

You are trying to Ravage him. Because that’s what you do. As you have Ravaged so many, “Son’s & Daughter’s”, before him.

I know your name, I know who you are…………

Tell My Son I Love Him……………..

When he calls on you for the Next hit, the Next snort! The Next High!

I have a beautiful SON!

I do not know where He is………….