October 18 2015

“I AM HIS MOTHER” Pg.16

 

your recovery

My Son was safe at my Sister In-laws, house. As we, were trying to get him a flight, back to Florida, that day. He asked, his G-d Mother for money to get his last fix. She reluctantly gave it to him, and the keys to her car, for him to meet the “DEMON” for the very last time.

She worried, that he would not return. She always worried about him. My Sister in-law, was his second Mother. She loves him as if he were her own.

This has taught me that, so many woman that are not biological Mother’s. Will love a child unconditionally. I feel if you can do that, you have the privilege of truly being called. “A Mother to a Child that you have not physically gave birth to. My Son, Always turned to her for guidance.

He returned and she brought him to the airport. They kissed and hugged. She wished him the best.

“You can, do it this time. All of the family, wants you to get better. You can do it! she said.”

He turned and went in. He waved goodbye from a window. She was relieved that he was going. What no one new was that in her bathroom.

He had taken five bags, of Heroin and began to inject each one.

(At a later time, I had asked him. Didn’t  you worry that all of that “Heroin would kill you?” He shrugged his shoulders and stated that he did not care! The drug makes you insane. It twists your brains around. The person addicted has absolutely know rationalization. Know time to even think that it will leave them for dead!)

 

His plane landed it was around diner time. We sat out side the airport.

My Husband mentioned the conversation with the Therapist. I had called the Rehab Facility and spoke with him. “Can we bring him at around eight o’clock.” He said,

“Your Son must first call me directly and say that he wants to come in! I replied he will.

Our Son, came out to us he looked so thin. Gray Face and Black Eyes.

We hugged and went to the car. He was very talkative and anxious.

I could not believe that he was actually sitting in the car. And, finally agreeing to take back his life. It has been many years since, My Son,was himself. I missed him. The way he was so care free. Focusing on all the things that he loved to do. Planning his life for the future. Business was his major. I had always wanted him to be a lawyer, because he could easily make a case, for anything that he needed or wanted.  He was quite a Foot Ball Player. He always had his haircut, and clean shaven. But most of all he had, Respect for his Mother and Father. Brother and Sisters. Singing and dancing,  just because it made him and everyone around him happy!

My Son’s personality, made him stand out from all others, intelligent and happy all the time.

My Son, also has a very big heart. Bringing home dogs that were strays begging us to keep one. Sadly his allergies, stopped us from getting one.

We went for diner at a nearby restaurant. What a day this has been.  But, just to see him sitting across from me. Gave me so much hope for his future. He started to talk about how, he was going to get through this. That he was ready for the challenge. Our Son, was going to save his own life. Somehow he came to a realization. That he had dreams for his life. A hope for doing something, meaningful.

We told him that,” We are right here for you, always remember that!”

When we got back home. He sat down and called his Therapist. He told him that,” He was ready to liberate himself from this terrible disease!” The Therapist then, invited him back to the Rehab Facility.

We told him that we were very proud, of him for taking this first step!

My Husband and I were now getting into the car. My Son was behind me, I turned to him and faced him. My heart was racing, I grabbed him by the shoulders and started to look right into his eyes. Now Yelling, I said to him,

“ You Are No Longer My SON! You have a DEMON Inside of

YOU!

Get Him Out, Get Him Out  of  You and Return To Me!

(I smacked him in the face, the rage I felt was so hard to control!)

 

Then he got into the car. We then drove to the Rehab Facility. He kissed us good bye and went inside. My Husband drove out of the Facility, but while on the main road, he had to pull over into a parking lot, because we were both crying! We said, a prayer

 G-d please watch over him and protect him.

While he fights the addiction inside of him.

“AMEN”